Tuesday, August 01, 2006

For those of you....

....that though that LAST joke was bad, try this one:

John went to visit his 90 year old grandfather in a very secluded rural area.

After spending a great evening chatting the night away, John's grandfather prepared breakfast of bacon, eggs and toast.

However, John noticed a film like substance on his plate, and questioned his grandfather asking, "Are these plates clean?"

His grandfather replied, "They're as clean as cold water can get them. Just you go ahead and finish your meal sonny!"

For lunch the old man made hamburgers. Again, John was concerned about the plates as his appeared to have tiny specks around the edge that looked like dried egg and asked, "Are you SURE these plates are clean?"

Without looking up the old man said, "I told you before sonny, those dishes are as clean as cold water can get them. Now don't you fret, I don't want to hear another word about it!"

Later that afternoon, John was on his way to a nearby town and as he was leaving, his grandfather's dog started to growl, and wouldn't let him pass. John yelled and said, "Grandfather, your dog won't let me get to my car".

Without diverting his attention from the football game he was watching on TV, the old man shouted ... "COLDWATER, GO LAY DOWN!!!!"


At 12:23 AM, Blogger Sarah O. said...


By the way, how's Cookie?

At 3:32 AM, Anonymous insomniac said...

both jokes remind me of this one...

a father is taking his young son to his first baseball game. about midway the son asks, "Can I go wee now?"

"Just wait a little longer, son."

The 7th inning stretch comes:
"Can I go wee now?"
"Games almost over, hold out till then."

Finally the game ends, walking out they pass a men's room, the son says:"Can I go wee now?"

"Yes, now you can go wee."

The son says :"WHEEEEEEEE!!!"

At 10:00 AM, Blogger wysiwyg said...


(But in a good way)

At 4:13 AM, Blogger x_claire_x said...

hey. kool site. came across it cause my name actaully is claire martin but I live in scotland but i've read up on the dave barry guy...long story how it started but i know another claire martin who kinda stalks me :P nd then i found out bout this other person stalking the canadian one nd i was like wow...my life is reinventing itself in canada. well anyhoo, are you canadian? and if so do you like salmon? just doing some research for my friend who is obsessed by canada. im just hoping your not think oh my god who the hell is this girl by now but hey, ive written rather alot so i better head. i would really appreciate it if you visited my site and leave a message...i mentioned you in one of my posts. thnaks, claire x

At 10:09 AM, Blogger Sarah O. said...

Gee, I can't top that last comment.

But, hey, wys, it's been a long time! Winter doldrums got you down? There are meds for that.

Please write another blog entry, even if it is one of your famous groaners! We miss them and you!

Oh, and (ahem) Please visit my blog and leave a comment. I am desperate. I knew you'd understand.

At 6:39 AM, Blogger x_claire_x said...

hey. thanks for your message. im sorry about the random questions but your explanation has cleared up alot of stuff..although the fact that this means that the claire martin your talking about isnt one of the many ones i talk about is a bit disturbing. there are way 2 many claire martins on this earth! oh well, but as a word of warning if you know anyone by the surname martin please dont let them call their daughter claire. its not right. i hope this message leaves the other posters on your blog as bemused as the last one! claire x


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