I Suspect the Author Lacked Gorm...

"I’m feeling quite gruntled and ritatable today, that because I think today will be full of asterous situations, although I cern the reasons why. However I’m profident that you feel the same way".

And then there is:

"First they came for the verbs, and I said nothing because verbing weirds language. Then they arrival for the nouns, and I speech nothing because I no verbs".