Saturday, November 19, 2005

Change a letter and you get...

The Washington Post's Mensa Invitational once again asked readers to take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing one letter, and supply a new definition.

Here are this year's {2005} winners (#15 is particularly true of me!):

1. Intaxication:
Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you
realize it was your money to start with.

2. Reintarnation:
Coming back to life as a hillbilly.

3. Bozone (n.):
The substance surrounding stupid people that stops
bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer,
unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future.

4. Foreploy:
Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of getting laid.

5. Cashtration (n.):
The act of buying a house, which renders the subject
financially impotent for an indefinite period.

6. Giraffiti:
Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.

7. Sarchasm:
The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who
doesn't get it.

8. Inoculatte:
To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.

9. Hipatitis:
Terminal coolness.

10. Osteopornosis:
A degenerate disease. (This one got extra credit.)

11. Karmageddon:
It's like, when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes,
right?
And then, like, the Earth explodes and it's like, a serious bummer.

12. Decafalon (n.):
The grueling event of getting through the day consuming only
things that are good for you.

13. Glibido:
All talk and no action.

14. Dopeler effect:
The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you
rapidly.

15. Arachnoleptic fit (n.):
The frantic dance performed just after you've accidentally walked
through a spider web.

16. Beelzebug (n.):
Satan, in the form of a mosquito, that gets into your bedroom
at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.

17. Caterpallor (n.):
The color you turn after finding half a worm in the fruit you're
eating.


And the pick of the literature:

18. Ignoranus:
A person who's both stupid and an a**hole.

3 Comments:

At 12:00 PM, Blogger neophyte said...

LOL!! Good find, Wysi! I'm laughing at the thought of you dancing around brushing off cobwebs!

 
At 4:46 AM, Anonymous insomniac said...

nice list! my Mom, tired of being asked what was for dinner, would write it on a blackboard. It was an easy job to transform 'meat loaf' and 'chicken and dumplings' to 'meat load' and 'chicken and dumpings'.

 
At 7:43 PM, Blogger Kafaleni said...

I should know better than to do a blog visit while eating dinner. Corned beef with mustard sauce is very tasty. Mustard sauce snorked up the back of your throat and into your nose HURTS. Okay?

 

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